Friday, March 9, 2012

Rule #2 - Limit Your Personal Hygiene

This is a basic and very easy step to staying single.

Cut out or reduce some of your simple daily habits like brushing your teeth, washing your hair, etc. (Maybe not all of them at once, you do still have to interact with your friends and family.)

Not only are you helping yourself to stay out of the dating pool, but you're also saving yourself a few pennies in restocking these things you normally use every day.

Fellas, try asking a girl out after not bathing for a few days. If you can even get close enough, I gaurantee they will say no.

Ladies, go without washing your hair and see if any guys dare to approach you.

And don't let it be a secret, if it seems like you are peaking someone's interest, brag about how you only wash your hands after going to the bathroom sometimes. Or how you don't have time to brush your teeth because you're so busy. Brushing your hair is so last decade!

True Story: My brother and I were going out with one of his friends, who asked us to pick up a couple of other friends on our way. I was sitting in the back while my brother and his friend sat in the front.

The two guys we were picking up got in the back with me and the smell that followed was absolutely putrid. Thankfully I was by the window!! I rudely faced the window the entire time, begging God to make the stench go away. Hold on....sorry, the memory almost made me pass out. Even when we got out of the car because we had to change the tire, we went across the street and could still get whiffs. It was bad. I can't even pin point what exactly it was.

Needless to say if either of them had asked me out I would have replied with a resounding "Hell no!"

No comments:

Post a Comment